Sydney G asked:


I have a legal separation from the courts, but now want a final divorce. What do I need to do?

STACY

Justin DiMateo asked:


Divorce is an emotional, stressful ordeal for a couple to endure, and the presence of children in the marriage makes the process even more difficult. One of the first decisions that will have to be made in the event of a separation or divorce is which home the kids will spend most of their time in. There are no easy answers to this question, but parents who cannot come to an agreement may have the custody battle settled in court.

There are many factors that may go into determining which home will serve the best interests of the children, which is why it is important to have the help of an Irvine child custody lawyer who can ensure the process will continue smoothly and fairly. It is important that each parent works with an individual attorney who will protect that person’s rights. Sometimes, the children even need to have their own attorney involved to make sure their best interests are taken into consideration.

Difference between Legal and Physical Custody

The matter of child custody is further complicated by the fact that there are different types of custody to take into consideration. Physical custody is generally given to the parent the child will be living with most of the time, since this is the person who will be physically with the child the most. Legal custody entails the decisions that go into raising the child, and may include decisions about health care, education and religion. In some cases, one parent may have primary physical custody while both parents equally share legal custody. An Irvine child custody lawyer will be able to help parents determine the best interests of the child in both of these areas.

Joint and Split Custody

Two types of child custody settlements that are not recommended as often are joint custody, where both parents share equally in the physical custody, and split custody, which entails splitting up siblings so each parent can have a child full time. The courts generally do not like either one of these arrangements typically, since most psychologists will agree that either of the situations will be stressful for the child. The rare occasions where joint custody is awarded will usually involve two parents who have proven they can work well together for the sake of their children. If one of these situations actually appears to be the best solution, an Irvine child custody lawyer can ensure that this agreement is properly carried out.

In most cases, the courts would prefer that parents reach their own agreement on child custody. This can be done with the assistance of Irvine child custody lawyers assigned to each party, and a mediator if necessary. If parents cannot reach an agreement, the courts will be forced to decide how custody will be awarded. Many factors will go into this decision, such as a child’s preference if he is old enough to say, best interests of the child and the child’s primary caregiver. An Irving child custody lawyer working for each party will ensure the decision is fair and that the rights of both parents and the children are protected throughout the process.



LOIS

me asked:


living in Mexico and you were married in Mexico if you file for a divorce due to “abandonment” by your husband?

STEPHANIE

Wide Awake asked:


I personally know of two different men who’s wives started treating them badly after they started losing their hair which ended up in divorce. Coincidence?

LAVERNE

William Rigby asked:


child custody is in my opinion the most important decision to be made when a mom and dad split up. Joint child custody should be considered. This will give both parents rights in the decisions of the kids lives.

In this custody agreement mom and dad share the responsibility of making choices for their children. Joint child custody can cover both physical and legal Legal matters pertaining to the children.

The parent with legal custody gets to make all the decisions of a child’s life including health-doctor, Education-school, Welfare of said child. The parent who had physical custody is the one where the child will be living most of the time.

Both parents can have joint custody in these two areas. Mom or dad may have the child monday through friday. The parents may split the time during the week. This has to be thought through very carefully. You do not want to make it tough for the child while in school. Staying at a parents house during part of the week that is quite a ways away from the child’s school will make it tough on the that child and can affect the school work being done.

Now if the parents have split up and are both still in the same school district this would not be a problem.

How do you about obtaining the joint child custody result? The parents may differ on this.

The easiest way is to come to an agreement between the two parents themselves. This will save each parent a significant amount of money in terms of lawyer’s fees and court costs.

The other way is to go to court and let the judge decide. Depending on the parent, the judge may rule for joint child custody. He also may rule that one parent would be better for the child to stay with. This is most certainly true in the case of mental and physical abuse to the child by one of the parents.

One thing to consider is the state within which you live. There are states that are no fault states as is the case in Pennsylvania.

What this means is that no matter how many times you spouse has cheated on you, the courts will not take this into consideration when it comes to determining if joint child custody is warranted.

The best thing you can do to prepare yourself and to increase your chances of joint child custody is to get as much information and some proven strategies that will work in you favor.



CATHERINE

Lily Woods asked:


Fathers battling court cases for child custody face a much tougher time winning the cases. Even when the court has become more balanced in their ruling but there is no denial there are some prejudice against men especially in custodial ruling.

The court tends to favor mothers for three main reasons. The first reason, the society perceives that a child received better care from mothers. Secondly, the court tends to view fathers as independent while both mothers and child are co-dependents. Finally, fatherhood in deemed to be participatory while motherhood has natural instinct and occurrence. Although these factors are arguable but the fact has been deeply ingrained into our culture.

Due to the above influencing factors, in order for a father to win a custody case, he must present extra documentation of evidence that he can also be a good guardianship. By doing so, he can show the court that he too can give the child the best option for growth and development if their custody is granted to him.

Fathers must know how to show the court that he is very involved in the child upbringing. One of the methods is by tracking the amount of quality time he has spent with the children. By presenting an accurate log of dates and time and activities with the child, he can prove his interest and involvement in the child’s daily life.

The second factor is financial. Men generally earn more, thanks to the society’s stereotyping of men being the breadwinner. Fathers should track monetary participation for bringing up the child, telling the court how much input he has contributed to the child living cost. By presenting these documentation, not only if will be compare with the ex spouse afford ability but this information will be in good use in alimony and child support hearings.

The last but not least evidence the fathers can collect is the mother’s negative behaviors, which deem to have bad impact on the child upbringing. These include substance abuse, adulterous behaviors, physical or emotional abuse and such. The court will not tolerate accusations therefore solid proof must be presented. In many cases, a child investigator is secured for indisputable evidence.

Fathers have to work harder to gain their child custody. However, do not fight for the child solely because you want to retain something from you ex spouse. The decision to contest is best made after a long time thinking of who will be the guardian for the child.



MITCHEL

VB asked:


I am getting a divorce here in the near future I have to daughter that I love with all my heart and soul. I am in the military and my soon to be X is planning to move to colorado. I will try my hardest to get stationed there, but being in the military nothing is never guaranteed. My question is how can I maintain a realitionship with my girls and to let them know that I love them and don’t like being away from them. Will someone give me an ideas.

PAUL